Society has much gendered behavior in regard to intimate partner dynamics. As a general rule, many individuals with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder) have great difficulty sussing out the what, why and how of relational dynamics. Indeed, there are many books detailing such for the neurotypical (Not Autistic) people.
Yes, we can read those and gain certain insights. But, as we with ASD know, much of those books tasks and observations depend on the ability to suss out and read behavioral and facial cues that we, as ASD, struggle with. It’s not impossible, no, but it takes practice and compassion with ourselves, and for those in world to work with us, walk us through, and not give up and throw us aside completely.
I know. Its happened to me. With ASD, we require clarity and directness. As any romantic comedy will tell you, vulnerability is a state few want to admit they are in, nor do they want to open themselves up to it. Therefore, the clarity, the vulnerability those of us with ASD require to know what is going on in friendship and intimate partner connection often doesn’t happen because, well, people get freaked out having to be so clear and straight forward with us.
Add homosexuality, as I personally experience, into the mix, and the complication is complete.
How to show sexual/romantic interest? Who knows!
How to interpret one is receiving sexual/romantic interest from a woman when you are a queer woman? Yikes!
Be a queer woman who is autistic trying to figure all this out! Impossible!
And, due to homophobia combined with little understanding of the Autism Spectrum Disorders in women, generally, there are no books to read, few to none counselors to see, nor any behavior therapists to ask.
My blog is intended to discuss my experiences, receive feedback from others, and perhaps write a book about all this to help out my fellow Queer Autistics, no matter where in the LGBTQ+ alphabet we follow.