The greatest gaslight and fallacy is that you don’t need to learn cues if you’re not Autistic.
That’s a lie. We all do.
Neurotypicals take for granted the social skills they are told they inherently have. It’s a fallacy that social cues are entirely based upon DNA’s power gained through evolutionary time that enables us to read faces and determine friend and foe.
To a point, on the basic visceral level, yes. Even Autistics have this skill, factually.
It’s the nuance of social cues derived from complex and varied cultures that Autistics have trouble sublimating, and in that we take time a longer time.
Simply a longer time, I emphasize.
For, all persons regardless of neurological framework must be enculturated, learn social cues, mores, ethics, rules, etc. You neurotypicals have and are constantly learning such cues simultaneous to us simply, possibly, at a faster pace, but perhaps not as deeply.
Your speed creates in you a false mastery wherein we Autistics have to work harder at it, therefore, through our more deliberate practice, likely build Mastery those who don’t have to work so hard lack.
Practice makes perfect, and if you don’t think you need to practice, you are often going to remain mediocre. It’s the same for social skill.
For almost 40 years, I’ve put in tremendous effort to understand the human social animal and all the varieties therein. Deliberate, conscientious, hard work discussed via journaled, therapeutic and social group interactions, university courses and academic symposiums. I’ve delved and discovered, and came to a truth.
The world is trying to convince me I don’t know what I’m talking about, because I’m Autistic, when, in truth, it has no idea what it’s talking about, and is trying to gaslight me so it doesn’t have to work and try.
The world of neurotypicals has spent a great deal of time and energy attempting to gaslight atypical neurologies into thinking they have it all wrong, but, instead, the world doesn’t want to admit ignorance.
Social Knowledge and Savvy is a Power to be wielded, and telling Autistic Folk they don’t understand such knowledge is simply keeping Power and not sharing in innovation. It’s oppression. It’s saving face, ego-based fear. No excuses, and such perpetuates the same racism, sexist, classist difficulties over and over.
Racism, sexism, classism, ableism, etc., are all forms of prejudice derived from a lack of diversity and poorly implemented social skills. It takes no skill to be hateful and great skill to be compassionate.
The Empathic Autistic of whom inherently believes all person are like themselves through a varied Theory of Mind readily assumes others are kind, alruistic, and compassionate as themselves. A varied Theory of Mind makes us assume pain given us is pain you will also feel. Emotions and causes we have, that, you, too, will have and be derived similarly. For, we Autistics feel powerfully and struggle to manage such feelings, not, as misassumed, feel nothing at all. We are so opposite the lack of empathy the world believes us to have.
It is a fallacy and gaslight the world perpetuates in saying we Autistics have no empathy. The world does not have empathy, with its oppression and imbalance, not we Autistics.
The world in it’s prejudical judgements and fear of being exposed throws out lies and comfabulations to attempt we minority and oppressed groups take blame for the neurotypicals world’s falts and what it has so gravely caused.
World, take your gaslights back, illuminate yourself, for you have a job of work to do.